Guess where am i? not in Mumbai.. but in Ahmedabad.. came here to complete my animation and fulfilling the Administration's formalities by getting ready to make the documentation for my project. But am i happy?
No...
why am i saying that? what made me unhappy? Am i really sad? i have no answer .. as of now.. you would read below and find out whats my true state:-
I guess life was never harder for me than these days.. what i am talking here is of me getting involved in a relationship where its a do or die situation now! i would clear that below..this is not too far away.
It was just about an year and a half time ago when i made this unusual friendship with a girl who inturn responded to my profile n friend request, thinking that i might be a nice guy! Well, im not denying that fact ;) But see.. how i then took it forward was entirely dependent on me. When she gave me her email ID, so i sent a mai with my slight intro. i didnt get a response for few days and i also didnt send another mail or something but one fine day, her reply came with a slight intro!! i then assumed the girl to be a trustworthy, gave her my number so that she could call me when she would get a new mobile(as she told me earlier)!
After some series of mails, she finally got her mobile and then in response of her msgs thru it.. i straight away went on an attitude of calling her up:) i guess thats quiet impressive for a girl coz she would think that i'm not playing a fool with her and is not hesitant to talk to a girl too. So i had a slight nervous initial conversation where the girl was confident. I didnt find her to be that attractiv and all but i got a feeling that there was someone who cared about friendship :)
initially i used to call her according to a fixed time slot that she had given.. but later on i started calling her any times as she also didnt feel any uncomfortable at home. so thats how a healthy sms friend became a true friend.
But around December- February i almost forgot her coz of a girl from mumbai. we met online and then grew very close faster. In one month we became too attached to each other. I thought this was a beginning of a relationship which i awaited long enough. O man! this girl was awesome. the way she spoke n her presence of mind n humour sensibility was damn good. i fell in love with that :) we then constantly were in touch. She was the one who used to call me from her landline and then talk to me for half an hour or so. (At those times that was too long a time for me.. ;) but it used to pass by, too quickly)
we used to Chat on messenger daily.. may be two times a day.. in after noon and in the evenin sometimes.. But the every nite schedule was fixed. She used to come online at 11 coz her parents used to sleep. and then used to chat with me for some 1 hour or so. sometimes if the conversation is interesting then it went on even til 3.30-4.00 am or so. Then i also used to call her about every other alternate day or so and asked her how she is doing and stuff:) Anyway this didnt go too further as i became a bit busy and her exams were also nearing.
So i felt she slowly began to drift away from me. her father had blocked the landline so she couldnt call me. then she was seen as somebody who was not that interested to talk to me. most of the times i have fought with her coz of that. Even on phone. then i used to make up also. becoz i feel i became too posessive about her. but she then started disconnecting my calls. and i used to become too depressed by her attitude. i thot i missed one more gal in my life :(
So thats how it was.. i lost touch with mumbai chat gal and then begin to see life anew.. it was in May that i again went to Mumbai for my project search and i came in contact with chat gal again. we talked for few days. i even gave a landline number but she didnt call back. then i wanted to meet her but she made excuses and backed off. i was very disappointed and then i finally ended up all conversations with her. i came to Ahmedabad and tried calling sms friend as her mobile was also call barred since months or so.
And then i constantly used to get her sms. i didnt really giv replys but still maintained a touch with her. anyway once she unexpected called too. because she generally didnt use to call me. that made me happy. Well.. there is one more factor which brought this gal closer is that sround last week of may i was unwell.. and this was the only gal i felt was caring enough for me. When i use to call me she use to ask how my health was all. So that made me closer :)
Then i went home.. and we constantly started chatting on phone. i used to call her sometimes when she wasnt well and still had to go for training. All that brought her also closer to me. And then i went to Mumbai again in mid-June 2005. And she went to Bangalore and wasnt in touch with me for 10 days. i stayed with my cousin sis and her husby. they were happy to see me and i too was seeing them for the first time in my life.
Well life went on.. a usual daily process of calling people and going to places to show my portffolio. then i finally got a chance to meet her. o god! this is unbelievable.. it was because oe of our films that we made made it to the Chennai 1 minute Ability competition. And i thought this can be the opprtunity for me to meet her. She also felt that and began pleading through sms that i should go there and meet her. Because anyway she wanted to meet her "lucky and caring friend".
So thats how i reached in Chennai for the first time. I mean i did go there.. but only roamed around in the station and its outskirts with my dad some 16 years ago.. so i eventually was out of any kinda memory that i could have stored in my brain. second major problem was going to be language. i didnt know how to read and understand tamil :( but you know. its unbelievable how this gal helped me to get to the nearby hotel to Anand theatre. O man! it was only because of her that i didnt get lost in Chennai on my first arrival. because i had no contacts there, i thought life would have been hell.
Anyway, that was how it was.. through sms only i contacted her and found out a hotel himalaya which was closer to Anna Salai (mount road). and when i reached there it was night. anyway.. wen i reached adyar, time was already over for me to report and so thats how time was eaten up in the middle. Anyway, i thanked God that i was safe :) and i just ordered a biryani frmo the beelboy and thought of the meeting with my unseen friend "Snu".
